Poetry/Spoken Word

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The Question

I lived in shadows and alleys and masked pains that made me cry out for death

Knowing why was my hearts cry even as a young child

I still don't know the answers

What I do know is that I have been the catalyst to others healing because of my pain

I was forced to live this life despite my cries to walk among the dead

I was deemed this life of being privy to pain and what the ultimate peace feels like

No hands full of pills or beaten down self esteem would be enough to answer the questions that always begin with WHY?

Why was it me?

Why couldn't I be?

Why choose me?

Why Not Me?

Sounds like self pity?

I pity no one, not even my self

I pulled up my boot straps long ago and made decisions to leave it all up to my maker 

Yet and still I want to know, Why was I chosen to became The Girl in the Alley 

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Fabric of a Woman

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Those scissors in your hand,

Do you think they change my value, think they change my worth

You are cutting me into pieces,

Leaving me exposed

And yet she says,

I am cut from the finest of cloth

My thread count supersedes that of any other in existence

I hold in warmth during the coldest winters

Coolness in temperatures of 125 and above

Rain rolls off my outer as water to a ducks back

Build a tent of me and I will withstand the strongest winds

Immersed  in an array of colors, for I wear well. 

I am a Kings choice garb to adorn his arm as he sits before his peers. 

My remnants are sought after to assure that none goes to waste. 

But They become the finest linen at the most exquisite gala or 

tied around collar with matching pocket decor of tailor  made suits. 

I am critiqued for flaws that only make me more unique. 

My original pattern can never be mimicked

And my creator dare not compare me to others

For He knows my worth 

Which is why he sets me on the highest shelf in await the appropriate buyer. 

I am women

I am queen

Virtue in me

Fleet of foot, I surpass the best

In my sleep I do what others only dare to dream

I am choice

Primal yet never extinct. 

Fragrant of success

Admired by many 

I am women. 

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Reminder

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Just in case you lose yourself along the way

Don't forget to smile more 

Don't forget to hug more

Don't forget to laugh at jokes that aren't funny

Don't forget to check yourself before others do

Don't forget to love harder than you've ever loved before

Don't forget to share the wealth of knowledge that God is giving you

Don't forget that others have feelings too

Remember you don't know everything

Remember it's not about you all the time and most of the time it's never about you

Remember whose you are and who you represent

Don't forget that God knows better than you

Remember that he made you to love you not hurt

Remember your children need you

Remember your mate needs you

Remember the purpose that came from the passion and the pain that exposed the passion

Remember to remember and remind yourself along the way.

(Use sticky notes, people, places, touches, smells, tie a string on your steering wheel, letters never opened, drive by the old landmarks ,.........) 

Send yourself email reminders or text message yourself and never open it.

If you do open it to remind you, forward it to yourself again. 

But remember never forget to stay whom God made you to be. 

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There's Beauty in Scars

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I see your scars, they are beautiful scars. 

Scars try to peel back and expose the rawness of your hurt. 

But never the less, your scars, they heal. 

You have grown despite the pains and learned lessons that only scars like ours give. 

Giving way to facts that we heal well. 

Growing not callus and heartless as some who pick at our scars. 

But empathetic to the pains of others who never expose theres. 

They hide in shadows and walk dark hallways alone. 

Garments cover scars,

Self inflicted after no one seems to see nor hear the scars of actions from those who tormented. 

What about a simple good morning

Or an, I see and I too have scars. 

To lift up the head of those whos scars go unnoticed or so they think. 

You see we see, we see those scars,

We see fear behind their smiles as we learn to heal our own scars. 

Our scars are healing!

Questions of Why go unanswered but we embrace these scars and see that we can heal and avoid scars for others. 

We should know, we have dealt with some hard blows. 

Our scars made us this way. 

Made Us fearful yet fearless rewinding moments and capturing what we won't allow next time.  

Our scars made us,

No, the scars exposed the beauty already within the tender hearts of our chests that beat with passion for freedom for others. 

Beat with ambition for ideals to stop others from being scarred.

These scars did not make us beautiful, we already were. 

Our beauty is why they chose to give us scars. 

So now we embrace each scar as beauty reminders. 

Reminders to embrace and permit others to embrace the us within us and no more scars do we accept. 

I too have scars and see your scars to your beauty

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